It seems as though I just can't keep focused on God, His will, and all things related to my eternal soul. I get too easily distracted by the "shiny" things life has to offer...like T.V. shows I just can't miss, or updating my status on Facebook with something witty for my friends to marvel at, or going out for dinner & movie dates with my husband. There are so many other things in this world that seem so much more...well, fun compared to daily chit-chats with God.
It's not always the entertaining things that distract me though. I am a chronic worrier. I stress out about all things--big and small. My mind constantly projects a "To Do" list across the inside of my eyelids like a CNN news reel. It gets so bad I can't sleep sometimes. My brain just won't shut itself off. What's that God? You want me to read my Bible now? Go to church?! Sorry, but I'm a little busy here. Raincheck?
The truth is, I went to church last month for the first time in 10 months. TEN MONTHS! How did THAT happen? I was born and raised in a family that--come Hell or High Water--we WENT TO CHURCH! Even when we were on summer vacations away from home, we would often find a local church to crash on Sunday mornings. But then I grew up. I got married. I moved away from home. I started going to University. Life got busy.
My faith became a childhood hobby of sorts. I was obsessed with it growing up. I was passionate, on fire! It was a priority in my life. But as I grew older and life began piling on responsibilities, the hobby dwindled down to being something I only occasionally "dabbled" in. Sunday mornings became my "sleep-in" time. Prayer became an inconvenience and, eventually, a painful struggle. I felt like a walking hypocrite.
This is my first post to this blog. I've spent too long mimicking a speed bump on the road to Christ. It's now time for me to get off my butt, dust myself off, and give those leg muscles a stretch. I want to start walking again. I'm sure there are bumps in the road ahead. I'm sure I'll stumble and fall again. But the stumbling only happens when I take my eyes off the destination and get distracted by the things in the ditch. And, shiny or not, the only thing waiting for me in the ditch is garbage.
I'm hoping there are others out there who will join me. Make sure you pack some Band-Aids. There will likely be some scrapes and bruises along the way.
"3 He will not let you stumble and fall; the one who watches over you will not sleep.
4 Indeed, he who watches over Israel never tires and never sleeps.
5 The LORD himself watches over you! The LORD stands beside you as your protective shade"
(Psalm 121:3-5)
At least we can rest assured that God is indeed there to help us up. I think all too often though I either don't see Him there--I'm too blinded by those "shiny objects" in the ditch. Or I slap His hand out of the way like a belligerent child, insisting I can do this "all by myself!" Hopefully those days are over.
God,
I'm sorry for ignoring you. I'm sorry for being such a stick in the mud. I want to get back on track. I want to be the person you want me to be. Show me how to walk this journey. Forgive me for getting distracted. Thank you for always being there for me...even when I was being a jerk or a child.
From,
Me.
I think we all have problems with this. I know that I am often distracted from spending time alone with God by "The Urgency of the Generally Insignificant." It is a wonderful thing that God's grace extends to everyone — even me. Randy
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